Today I had the strangest sensation… as G stood in the kitchen and Jared and I at the table.. ahhh out of no where a wave of a gut punch hit me. G is still a foster child.
I said, “Jared, do you ever just look at him and think gah he’s still in foster care?” Gosh. I have to remind myself sometimes it seems so surreal how long he’s been here, but then like yesterday.
How much apart of us that we call him by our last name, when legally he doesn’t share ours yet. So much ours, but still juggled by the state.
Raised completely here almost, but as his momma- I’m also Jane Doe. But, the thing is I can’t imagine life without him now nor do I want to.
No one is in a hurry to read his appeal or speed things along. So my baby is still in foster care. I do daily wish whoever’s desk his appeal is sitting on they could see him as a real person and pick it up and just read it.
Just move on his behalf to be out of limbo. He’s so much apart of us- it’s hard to believe we are still here in this place. I’ve always wondered what I would tell the judge when ask certain questions at our adoption.
But, today as I stared in disbelief he’s not officially ours I realized that’s just it.. he’s never ever Ever for one second seemed like an outsider. He’s never seemed like anything, but a perfect prayed for gift from God. Molded perfectly to fit right here since the beginning of time. Like a puzzle piece that without question fit.
So what’s stranger is that we got a call the other day for someone to sponsor him again this Christmas for the third straight Christmas in a row. Because (gut check) he’s a foster baby still. But, not in our hearts not here he isn’t- here he’s our perfect addition. 🤍
XO.
