Break my heart Lord for what breaks yours.
I was shielded to the magnitude of G’s abuse at first.
I saw what had happened, but I was excited our family was growing and the answer to a prayer we had prayed for months was here!
I was also needed to help G heal, to stay up when he was scared, etc. I had no time to break I thought.
Until, a year later.
It was after a visit we had to bring G to that was very challenging for all parties.
But, mostly for G. It took him four weeks to sleep again afterwards. During this time I broke for him.
I was driving to Greenville to do some shopping over Christmas break. The combination of so many sleepless nights, the realization of the magnitude of abuse, and sin opened my eyes.
Actually, God did. I started to cry. Granted, I had cried about it before.
But, nothing like this. It was like I didn’t have control of how I felt anymore and I was So sad and so mad.
I now felt it- that someone I loved with my entire being had be hurt badly. I called my preacher and turned my car around and headed to church. It was the only thing I knew to do.
I had been begging the Lord for a few days at that point to help me let it go- to lay it down- and to forgive in my heart.
Our preacher reminded me that day of Joseph and all he went through to get to where the Lord had designed for him. About the plan- the purpose- His divine hand. I have peace now, not always 100% moving forward sometimes a step or two back on the heart issues. But, I do think the Lord wants our hearts to completely break for what breaks His.
I do, I think we should be broken at abuse. I think we should be aware and look it in the eye so we as Christians can be praying and doing.
I stayed up the last two nights reading articles on the breaking news of child trafficking. Last night I felt it. My heart hurts for the innocent. It is broken for the magnitude of evil.
There has always been sin- always since the beginning of time. At the root, is the fix. It’s a problem that can only be solved with Jesus. He is a big faithful God.
But, we must also look it in the eye and be completely broken by it, pray for the Lord’s hand to move upon it, and how we can make a difference. 🤍
XO.
